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Sweet Little Mess

Sarah Melissa, 18, UP Diliman

I've been devouring books since forever. I write down my messy thoughts hoping that I could make sense of them.

hopeless dreamer(s)

Tags: snippets; gamechanger; eyecandy; photos; words

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Fave couple ever

Shocking week

So, last week was intensely eventful, and I must say, I had my share of both good and bad events.

Where to start… Good or bad?

Let’s begin with the bad. So friends of mine broke up, and it’s sad and messy. It’s disheartening, how people could throw away years worth of memories in a few days. Scary the way a lot of people break up despite the love being real. Well, not all real things are good and healthy. My thoughts? Maybe they really had to end it. But I think it would have gone better if issues didn’t pile up. Whew. And it’s stressful how I’m so involved, because one of them is a really close friend, and the other one, I’ve grown to like as the years passed. And also, there’s that other thing that came up, which I couldn’t mention here. But I know that it will just make us stronger. :)

Now on to the good. I went shopping with my girl! It was spontaneous. We were supposed to attend our PE class, but we decided to cut. Then we wanted to watch a movie, but unfortunately it was a block screening for IronMan and well, we didn’t want to watch that. So we went around, got inside Forever21, tried on clothes, then bought some. Whew. Goodbye, money from my godmother! I got myself new pants and two tops. My girl bought a Star Wars sleeveless shirt! Hihi. Andddd we ate at Bon Chon twice last week, ‘cause we have loads of money to spend. Loljk we’re now really poor. And her gift for my birthday is on its way! Yayyyy!

Also, a week after my birthday is another close friend’s birthday, which we celebrated yesterday, a day after her real birthday. I think I missed bonding with my high school girl friends, and maybe we’re getting closer now because of what happened with one of us… I guess there’s always a silver lining! :)

I guess there were more good things than bad ones? Thank You, ‘cause even though I might not deserve the good things, You never forget about me. And thanks to all the wonderful people in my life, of course :)


I’ve known SM (Sarah Melissa) even before I was a part of 7xi. She was the muse of Dao back in 1st year high school and I being an upperclass and a former Dao  student, had to “coach” her, along with her escort, for the annual Mr. and Ms. Freshman. I remember they “The Start of Something New” and danced something. HAHA! Well, Sarah didn’t win…fortunately.

We were also members of the same club but since I belonged to a different batch then, we really didn’t talk that much. Things changed after coming home from Japan. I was new to the batch and I remember SM being the first one to talk to me during our summer review classes. She actually welcomed me to her class and eventually, to the batch. Her barkada eventually became my barkada and we were now in the same clique. She wasn’t my classmate in 4th year but occasionally talked to each other.

I don’t know how our “being really good friends” started. But it was in 1st year college. We were in the same dormitory and same wing. I always borrowed her laptop and honestly, used it more than she does. I remember sleeping in her room (at her desk, actually) ‘cause I fangirl-ed using her computer. A LOT. I also remember that her first violation was because of me. I remember, walking around the department store with her and pretending to see each other 5 years from now. I remember sleeping on her bed while she couldn’t ‘cause I occupied the entire space. I remember using her phone to call him at midnight to greet him a happy birthday. I remember crying to her about him. I remember viewing XXX sites at the dormitory. :)) I remember her beating me at Kinect despite her being a really bad dancer. I remember drinking the night out. I remember going to my first college party with her. I remember her being there for me when I was really sad. I remember her being a really good friend…

And we still are. Despite not seeing each other very often, we still find time to see each other and catch up. I know she’s happy with everything that’s happening in her life (or probably not because of what happened to her acads, but still God has a better plan for her.) I really don’t like putting labels on the kind of friendship we have but I know and I feel that SM is a true friend. 

Happy Birthday, SM! Welcome to the world of young adults. I wish you happiness and pain; success and failure— cause all of these will make us better persons. I wish us infinite years of friendship. Like I’ve said in my text, I’m always here to support and cheer you. And I’m always here to listen and make puna when needed. Love you, girl! 

Awww sweet friend :”> Thank you Ate Pau! <3 Looking forward to more years of friendship! I love you :*

'Cause my best friend is a pose-ruiner but I love her like that. And I love this 'cause it looks so… Candid.

Nic’s 18th Birthday

Everyone’s turning eighteen, and my friend Nicole is actually one of the last girls in our batch to have a debut party. She’s the second one in our circle to have a party on her eighteenth birthday and probably the last one, too.

I met Nicole during our elementary days, but we weren’t close friends then. I only talked to her during quiz bees, which she usually won. And we exchanged text messages back in Grade 6, but even then, we weren’t really close.

We became best friends during our freshman days in high school, and we formed a group together with two other girls, Tatis and Nadine. Back then, we were partners-in-crime, the four of us. Our terror teacher (and adviser) used to scold us collectively — “Nicole and company!” — because we simply couldn’t be separated. Everything one does, all the others would do, too. Ahh, the carefree days.

After freshman year, our group’s friendship went uphill and downhill and up and down and up… But now, despite all the past issues and my constant physical distance from them (since I study in Diliman and they stayed in LB), we managed to still be a group. A lot has changed since the carefree first year HS days, but we all grew in our own ways, and maintained our friendship. Even the group’s size grew. We now have Bianca, Erin, Ynah… And though I’m frequently absent, I love these girls a lot.

So obviously, I wouldn’t miss Nic’s debut for the world.

Now, on to the photo dump.

That’s Nad, Nic the debutant, Tatis, yours truly, and Erin.

Let me present to you the usherettes. ;) That’s me, Tatis, Bianca, Nadine, Erin, and Marielle.

Intensely camwhore friends. And of course I wouldn’t let them hoard the camera. I had to get my share of shots too.

Party mode for me and Tatis.

And here’s another one.

And again.

And this one ends the series ;)

After our turns to give our own gifts to Nicole for the 18 Gifts part of the program, we surprised her with a song number. We sang The Script’s Man Who Can’t Be Moved since it was The Script’s PH concert, too, that night, and also ‘cause Nic’s heart is there ;) Of course, we get to have a big group hug for surprising her.

Nic doesn’t have a Tumblr account, and she doesn’t even know what mine is, so she probably won’t even see this, but… Happy eighteen years of a good life, Nickel! :) Cheers to more great years. <3

* Photos are from Tatis & Erin

today is high school friends day

that’s my best friend, Isah. i met up with her this afternoon after her math exam, and i was with her for around 30 minutes. it wasn’t enough, of course. i can’t wait to be with her again.

i promised Isah that i’d treat her at Moonleaf when we see each other, so i did. i ordered Hakka MT and she ordered Peppermint. guess what? she tasted the Hakka MT and liked it, so she asked to exchange drinks with me. hayyy, i missed my dear best friend! of course i agreed, ‘cause i love her and i thought it was funny. :)

i also met up with Ynah before that, and she bought me Dark Chocomint frappe. hihi, and then we talked about all sorts of things. missed that girl, too.

we also visited Casey at the hospital. she has dengue, and i hope she gets well soon. i had fun, ‘cause i really missed them.


  • it’s extremely cliche, but i guess it is true that one can forgive, but never forget. i can say sorry over and over again, but today i saw that she might have forgiven me, but it’s not going to be the same anymore.
  • and yes, i guess that goes for you, too. say sorry all you want, but that won’t change the fact that you hurt her, and that you weren’t worth it. i’m never going to like you.
  • i’m talking in vague pronouns. and not using capital letters. i’m not used to this laptop.
  • i realized that while some people could be instrumental, it is still i who could fix myself.
  • i don’t know if it’s just me, or… i just really did lose my position in some people’s lives. i guess that’s what college does. or what change does.
  • but i did miss them. i’m just not sure if they felt the same way about me.

On parties and the society

Because I’m lazy, I’d put all my thoughts in a single post.

  • I feel bad about turning down my friends’ invites to parties. I’ve recently decided to stop drinking until I turn eighteen, and I have really good reasons for that. They probably don’t believe me, but really, I’m doing this for myself, for my own good. Okay, that doesn’t sound like me. I am serious about this, though. I swear, friends, once I am of legal age, we can party again like we used to! :)
  • Now… On to the society. I find it really sad that our country is having a hard time keeping up with change and diversity. I believe that all these issues are dividing us. If only everyone listens and thinks with an open mind and heart… If only everyone would try not to be judgmental and accept the fact that we’re all different.
  • I have a couple of acads stuff to do. I haven’t started. It’s 10pm.

I sometimes wonder how much more I can take. Up to what extent will these people and things push against my limit?

that’s Emman & i more than a year ago, at Guijo’s yearender. we didn’t take photos of our hangout tonight, so i just chose this one. hahaha!

we had dinner earlier at McDo Katip, and then went to Tea.ology after to talk in a more quiet place. he had Strawberry Fruit Tea, while i ordered Raspberry MT. both were really good, and i recommend them! what i love about Tea.ology’s teas is that you could actually taste the tea in them, if you know what i mean. some other teashops don’t offer that. also, both Emman & i enjoyed the ambiance, as usual. :)

aside from enjoying the food & drinks, what’s even better was how hyper we were. we laughed at the weirdest things, and also talked about serious stuff. the perks of having a guy best friend, i must say, is that both of you learn about life from each other. Emman said he learned a lot from me — he actually quoted me at least twice tonight! hahaha! we somehow understand each other, though we have different opinions on some things. talks with Emman always have substance & sense, which is something you don’t get from everyone.

it was definitely a distraction from the stress looming over me these days due to acads.

Friends who stay

Yeah, I feel all ma-drama right now, that’s why I’m posting this. Hahaha, I’m just missing my long straight hair, actually. And the good times with these girls. :) This was taken at Ristretto, the coffee shop that we usually go to for unlimited wifi & food. ‘Cause those two things are really essential. Hahaha!


Have you ever watched your friends from afar and realized they seem happier without you.